I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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