Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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