Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Randomize
