Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
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