the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize