and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Randomize
