did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
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