Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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