Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Randomize
