is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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