They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
