She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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