i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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