Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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