brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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