Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Randomize
