Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
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