1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
