He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize
