I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
