Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize
