nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Randomize
