Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
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