Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize