I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Randomize
