He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
