uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
You're like the curious george of whores
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
