that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
