new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize