i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Randomize
