In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
