Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize