Even water is tasting like jack daniels
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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