So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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