I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Randomize
