eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
