Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
