Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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