I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
