Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
