I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
Randomize
