Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize
