oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize