yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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