Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
