I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
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