Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Randomize