I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Let's paint friendship bongs
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
