YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
