You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Randomize
