she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize
